That Time I Watched A Ping-Pong Show | Phuket

Last Thursday, we embarked on a trip to Phuket planned by yours truly for my birthday retreat. Since my birthday fell on a Monday, I was completely packed with school and work so I couldn’t legitly celebrate it that day. So after some discussion with YJ, ok jk he barely had time to think, I bought the flight tickets and accommodations almost immediately. Cause’ ya know, ain’t nobody got time to dilly dally like YJ(: Patong is known as a tourist hot spot in Phuket and they has some serious nightlife going on there so understandably, I figured it might be a good place to PARTAYYY *wink*

Day 1

When we landed in Phuket, we hired a cab to Patong and bought 2 data bundles at the airport. The trip to Patong was about 45 mins and we stayed at a boutique hotel-Mirage Patong Hotel. This is one of the hotels that is relatively near to the nightlife area, Bangla Road. Yes, you heard it right, I’m not kidding. Bangla Road is just two streets away from our hotel and the night market is just right beside our hotel too. The beach? It’s right behind Banglas Road so it is a 7 mins walk there from our hotel. That’s right, hotel placement is everything(:

Bangla Road comes to life at night when all dem strippers…I mean pole-dancers start doing their thang on the poles. The entire street has an open-concept of bars and clubs and hell yeah, pole-dancing everywhere in full view. We explored the area and went to check out Patong Beach, one of the densest beach filled with tourist in Phuket. Well, we barely made it for the sunset but hell, it was quite a sight. Parasailing was held near the shoreline of the beach and there were also jet-skis for use. But they were charging 2500baht for double parasailing and we figured, it’s too expensive for a 5-min experience eh?

Tour packages can be found everywhere at the street side booths and after much deliberation, we settled to go canoeing the next day. It costs us about 1200 baht each (SGD48) and it includes lunch and refreshments but the catch is that we had to wake up at 7.30am to meet the driver at our hotel. Yup, they provide that kind of service.

Day 2

After getting our asses up for breakfast at 7am, we waited for the driver at 7.30am as promised. We boarded the van filled with other customers and made our way to the jetty. The ride took us about an hour before finally arriving at the jetty. We took the big boat (legit with 2 storeys) and made our way to the islands.

The canoe package includes 3 canoe places and the first one is Phrang Nga Bay. We went into the caves and explored the caves for a little while. In side the caves, there were so many tiny bats on the ceiling and yup, it stank a little. At one point, we had to lean flat on the canoe in order to get through the cave, matrix-style 101. Dats some cool sht(: After about 45 mins we left for the next canoe destination at some random islands.

We got to see some rock features like the elephant rock cause it resembles an elephant yada yada yada. When we returned to the ship, we were served with lunch!! Their luch was a buffet styled spread on the tables with home-cooked dishes like vegetable curry etc which was pretty legit I must say. They even offered us rambutans for dessert xD

Amidst our last canoe segment, our selfie stick broke wtf…had to buy another one off the island when they left us there for shopping. James Bond Island was the highlight of the canoe trip because it’s one of the iconic islands that looks like it is balancing on it tip. As for why they called it James Bond…not sure. YJ had a try at canoeing and let’s just say the canoe ended up spinning instead of going straight. No explanations needed HAHA. After which, we made our way back to the jetty and they chauffeured us back to our hotel.

By the time we reached our hotel, it was already 6pm and boy were we starving. Grabbed dinner at a place called “Banana” Restaurant cause why not? (: Ate some legit thai green curry before going to explore their night market. The night market was packed with people and there was so much food everywhere! We ended up buying fried chicken from one of the stalls because …there’s a queue. Typical. For the record, the fried chicken was legit good and we went back for it the next day. Gluttons I know.

Did I mention we checked out the all-so-famous “Ping-Pong Show” in Thailand? Yup we did…we saw boobs and more boobs and hell…she could pull a fcking string of almost anything out her vajayjay. She even stuffed a LIVE FISH into her *ahem* and shot it out into the fishbowl…and guess what? It’s still swimming…the fish is swimming in the fishbowl wtf? That’s some cool sht man. It was an eye-opening experience indeed and yes I’m straight HAHA. Crazy insane stuff going on in there and well it was quite an experience(: Although I must emphasize that even though they insist that entrance fee for the show is “free”, you have to buy a drink to stay in the club and they range from 900baht to almost 2000baht. But that’s not all, the ladies will come around with tequila shots(pure) and ask you to “reward them”. Cmon man, with her boobs staring at ma face, who wouldn’t? HAHA When you agree to her request, not only u have to pay for her shots, you pay for yours too (240baht each). The other ladies who see you paying for her will come along and ask you to “reward them” as well. Boy, your hands are gonna be so full HAHAHA…so that’s how their sales techniques work eh 😀  Brilliant I must say 😡

Day 3

We had to choose whether we wanted to water-raft or just R&R but we decided we were too tired (ok it’s just me) so we ended up lepaking on the third day. We did some shopping along the streets and checked out the beach in our swimwear. Oh did I mention YJ forgot to wear his trunks to the breach wtf good job son. Had to go back to the hotel to change again before we headed back to the beach. Tsk.

“Sightseeing day” means you gotta check out the best viewpoint in Phuket which is PhromThep Cape. We booked a cab and made our way there for the sunset. Surprisingly, the view at the cliff was AMAZINGG… serious summer vibes right there. Took our shots and caught the insanely beautifully sunset before climbing our way up the hill to get back to the carpark. Oh, the rocks cut YJ’s palm when he was climbing the rocks to get closer to the edge of the cliff. He cried a little. Yup I’m sure he did(:

Tried their lobster for dinner and boy was it expensive. Well, lobsters are expensive everywhere-.- Shopped with whats left of our money and made our way to the hotel(:

Conclusion

Even though it was a short trip, I just felt the need to leave this place. Somehow dreading the responsibilities I have to face here. Buy hey, it was a great birthday getaway. Until next time, Xoxo.